I resorted to chocolate buttons - a small packet (or half a packet when I could get away with it!) We've tried fun songs, books, rewards etc.My instinct is let him keep sitting on the loo as at least he's trying and maybe one day we will get there again. Then I put a diaper on him and he goes pee right away. You’re frustrated, discouraged and angry. He came out a minute later, and said “a man helped me wash my hands.” Then pointed at someone leaving the bathroom. Your child doesn’t have distractions. Refusing to poo in a potty or toilet is a very common situation for toilet-training kids. I even went out and bought a Winnie the Pooh one that has a little flushy handle on it and say "good job". My oldest son has the same issues and he is seven. We had the same with DS2. Some quick points before I jump in: She’ll be turning 4 in a month. Now he's got no problems going at home. But I’m the mother. My 4 year old son won't go for a poo by himself to the toilet ... My 4 year old son doesn't go to the toilet for days which could be up to 5 days +. -ignoring her when she has these accidenrts and giving lots of praise when she uses the loo. Even something you would not notice or would think is a small change in her life can throw a four year old off. Do not conclude that your child got potty-trained if they have successful encounters a few times. Please note, as this is a peer-to-peer discussion board, Netmums has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. I don't have any real advice other than don't stress about it and it'll happen when he's ready. Not just pooping, peeing too. Not his woe, mine! x, I'm at my wits end with my 4.5 year old daughter. I have a 4-1/2 year old that just won't use the potty. star charts can be good, but my son is only good for a short time on them then he goes back to his old ways. Is this normal behaviour? My 4 year old can't or won't go to toilet From behaviour to bedtimes, school choices to screen time, this is the place to talk all things child-related. about a year ago when was having major probs with the wee thing as well, h/v advised me to take him too toilet after each meal and sit with him for ten minutes and read a book or something. With DS we just made toilet time after bath quite long. Have you spoken to the incontinance nurse? Try to pretend like it doesn't matter to you at all. Don't let a parent push their success with their two year old to make you feel like they have any idea about your 8 year old. He never wore pull-ups to school, and never had any accidents, but the minute he was home, he would have to have them on and go behind the sofa or a chair. One of my ds had been completely dry day and night for ages, but was still insisting on doing poos in pull-ups when he went into reception, so you can imagine how on edge I was! -rewards Ticked the chart each day for every wee or poo. was bribery! After collecting a set number of stars, give him a prize of … You feel like you’ve tried everything. He claims he can't tell when he has to go, but when he goes in his pants, he will sit in … Help!!! he is the same as your lo, you ask to go toilet and he just wont go. My little girl wont go for a poo she may go a little bit but then that is it. so we didnt go as when he's goin through a good patch i find it hard to explain how bad it is at times iyswim im not holding out much hope, im praising him for doing well at the moment but im very sceptical as ive seen this before and then he goes back to sqaure one. Xx, From behaviour to bedtimes, school choices to screen time, this is the place to talk all things child-related. First, I want to say that this is not an unusual situation. So i made him take a shower as he smelt like a public toilet. My dd has responded much better to me ignoring her. £4.90 from Boots, priceless to us. But I may have just replaced one problem with another!! Sure, there are 18-month-old children feeding the toilet, but to each her own (let’s face it, only girls potty train this early). how does everyone else's lo's get on with their no 2's? Sure, there are 18-month-old children feeding the toilet, but to each her own (let’s face it, only girls potty train this early). She is otherwise bright and intelligent but she will not go to the toilet of her own accord and even when you ask her if she needs to go she insists she doesn't need to and then 10 minutes later she is wet. Make a reward chart, and give him a gold star each time he goes to the toilet. Fingers crossed it works. He is somewhat special needs (still working on … When he turned 4 though, we told him no more diapers and that if he had to go poop, it would have to be in the toilet. My 4 year old won’t go no. I’m no longer afraid of sending him into the bathroom alone. She’s been peeing in the toilet just fine for nearly two years. She sits on the toilet for ages and can go up to times a day and just sit there. I’ll say when my son is ready. well, i did say i was going to let you know how i went on at doctors, but as usual, at the mention of doctors, suddenly jack miraculously improves!!! each time he went in the toilet. my 4 year old keeps waking up, any advice? Keeping as brief as I can. My 1 year old cat won't go out to the toilet since we have had snow so have to have a litter tray in the house which I - Answered by a verified Veterinarian We use cookies to give you the best possible experience on our website. Good Luck! Prime Minister to make an announcement tonight at 5 p.m. To tell them to find their own way to the airport in a foreign country. wouldnt wish it on anyone though its not nice clearing up his mess!! Xx. I will write more later. He had plenty of warning. Hoping someone has some advice for us! Toilets can run into many problems, but the most frustrating for many homeowners is when a toilet will not flush properly. And now he doesn't even say that. One now is completely dry at night and no problems at all but my other boy is waiting til bed time to have a poo He dances about when needing i try to get him to the toilet but absolutely refuses to go. I’m at my wits end. DS is 4 in two weeks and is doing this. Xx, Hi Anna. We've tried various things to help her to stop, such as positive verbal reinforcements, reminding her to use the bathroom frequently, using a chart with incentives, and taking privelages or toys away. This is page 1 of 1 (This thread has 18 messages.). It took a long time though, and alot of patience.he started school during this time and he eventually cracked it in the October. i seem to be the only one with that problem as well!! Think again! Jeanettex, Hi, my son is in reception class aged 5, he is the same. Share your tips for keeping your children’s skin comfortable through the winter months, Read what Mumsnetters thought of Cicaplast B5 repairing balm. For those who aren’t, the delayed training can have a physical cause like urinary tract infections. He keeps saying he is a baby and I keep explaining he is not he is a big boy. I too am at my wits end and was coming on here to post something and ask questions about the same thing! Please note, as this is a peer-to-peer discussion board, Netmums has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. im going to take him docs 2mo if i can get in because like you im at my wits end. Help, my 4 year old daughter is hitting at school. My 5-year-old daughter (she'll be 6 in a couple of months) keeps peeing in her pants. She is now starting to have accidents at school too. When you ask him why he doesn’t want to go, he says it hurts. Try to get him around an older male child but don't let it look like it is your idea at all. with my son its more the number 2's we have a prob with. Most of the advice in the archives relates to 4 and 5 year olds who still won't go poo but use the toilet to pee. You can also speak to the school nurse as well. We all clapped and cheered, and DS then decided he wanted to have a go too - and it worked. Hoping someone has some advice for us! Let me know how things go. He initially would say "I'm a little scared but I know it's good to go." By his behavior, I would guess that he would have a bowel movement every other day at the very least. https://www.netmums.com/coffeehouse/being-mum-794/children-4-11-years-60/253157-my-4-year-old-cant-wont-go-toilet.html#post9997794, Hi Is this normal behaviour? I just clean her, and put on clean pants and not say a word. If she can't make it to the bathroom in time, try to notice when it seems she needs to go and take her into the bathroom. Started potty training last year with my 2 three year old boys. Also, as hard as it is, trying not to react also helped the less worried I showed him I was about it the better. but my oh my.. nothing seems to work. Help!!! I can always tell when she is getting a urine infection as her behaviour gets bad. We were told NOT to try & pull it out ourselves (lol) as it may cause a tear & also to let him walk around bottomless - if the poo does work it's way through, well...it's only poo!! Go with your kid to the school bathroom to practise locking and unlocking the stall door or to see if the flushing noise is scary. He is fighting potty training like you wouldn't believe. (apologies if misspelled) A lot of children will get help and advice from this type of specialist nurse. 4-5 year olds are very busy, and they get absorbed in what they are doing. So he’s 6 months older and absolutely nothing has changed and I just want to scream. Advice. Toilet training has become a battle. He holds his poo for days and come the time it has to come out he'll go hide and squat also putting his hand over his bottom. Lisa S, hi, my son is the same. Nothing has worked so far and she is now in school and having accidents. As this is an old thread I wondered if everyone had got the issues with their children sorted by now, and if so at what age did things improve?? It has worked - now I have only a few accidents every now and again. Is really helpful for toilet training. Some quick points before I jump in: She’ll be turning 4 in a month. It can also be caused by a developmental delay. And only hiding in a bedroom not in the bathroom.We've tried all kinds of methods and had a little breakthrough a few weeks ago where he would sit on the loo in a pull up and go. Now he takes himself off, poos and cleans himself up with no involvement from us needed. Whether you need help figuring out if your child is ready to potty train or you’re wondering how long it will take, this is the place to get support from other parents. Follow these steps to defuse the issue. She will do anything for chocolate. We had over a year of it including witholding, constipation, laxatives and in the end supposotries. Totally relax and let him do it at his own pace again. I’ve tried everything. Such a bothering issue that 4 year old wetting pants can be quite familiar to many moms. Please please help I'm at my wits end!! Assuming your daughter has received a few months of instruction and is healthy, her behavior is the result of resisting toilet … Not so much the bathroom but upstairs and downstairs. Most children have the skills for toilet training between 24 and 30 months of age. We've tried various things to help her to stop, such as positive verbal reinforcements, reminding her to use the bathroom frequently, using a chart with incentives, and taking privelages or toys away. Slightly different for us as it was all aspects of potty training, so not sure if this helps at all but what cracked it in the end (after a lot of stress!) When he turned 4 though, we told him no more diapers and that if he had to go poop, it would have to be in the toilet. This is my first post in this sub. He must have been nearly five at that point - he's now in his 20s and it hasn't left him with any longterm scars! If your kiddo is refusing to go on the toilet, you have to ensure they have high confidence that the poop is not going to hurt. I’m at the end of my tether. Your 4 yr. old is refusing to go potty. cant say it really worked though. Most of the advice in the archives relates to 4 and 5 year olds who still won't go poo but use the toilet to pee. Your 4 yr. old is refusing to go potty. She screams and cries (weeks at times) and will only "go" in a pull up and needs to completely hidin from everyone! He also his with pull ups and wouldn't even sit on the toilet, let alone try. Potty training is a long process, and children learn and unlearn. She can do it but seems so lazy and just won't go. Your child won't use the toilet for the same reason he refuses to take a bath or go to bed: He's experimenting with limits and autonomy. One now is completely dry at night and no problems at all but my other boy is waiting til bed time to have a poo He dances about when needing i try to get him to the toilet but absolutely refuses to go. God forbid it goes on till 8. He only became interested in going on the potty when his cousin came to town for a visit. We had over a year of it including witholding, constipation, laxatives and in the end supposotries. I then cut a hole in the pull up the next night and he was fine when it dropped straight through. Go with your kid to the school bathroom to practise locking and unlocking the stall door or to see if the flushing noise is scary. Plus, clean up accidents promptly so your pup won't eliminate in those spots again. Help! Plus, clean up accidents promptly so your pup won't eliminate in those spots again. My 4yr old ds I going through this atm. This only happens with wees - she tells you quick enough if she needs a number 2 so I don't think she has a physical problem. Same for my dd1. We were told NOT to try & pull it out ourselves (lol) as it may cause a tear & also to let him walk around bottomless - if the poo does work it's way through, well...it's only poo! This is really really common right into school age so don't panic.You did the right thing but maybe took it too fast, go back a few steps for a few months and let him have the pullup to poo in while sitting on the toilet. There are lots of theories on why so many toddlers will poo only in a nappy. My son is not ready to potty train. Doesn’t even stop what he’s doing, or say anything. Just wanted to write this so I can find it again. Even went back to do more. I've tried everything I can think of, he seems genuinely scared of the potty. However he won't pee in the potty either. He suggested I talk to my health visitor and said it was most likely a behavioural problem and is common in young girls who try and hang on til the last minute but then leave it too late. 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